So how have I been passing my time? I have been focusing on my faith. I have been reading books and meditating and praying. Through this I have attained a peace within and I feel that everything will go exactly as it's supposed to. This is the most comforting thing I could ask for. Also thanks to my new found inner peace I have been able to help 2 friends in very different situations but who both needed guidance.
Faith has always been a hard thing for me to deal with. I don't enjoy discussing it, not because I might be ridiculed but because it is the most private part of me and I feel that it should stay that way. I have opened up completely to my friend Nick and because of that we have started connecting on a deeper level. We are both Catholic and Conservative so a lot of my beliefs overlap with his but the differences are enough to keep us talking for hours. I have never before found it so comfortable to discuss my personal relationship with God and I wonder if that was the final obstacle that I had to pass before I could move on with my life.
I have matured more than I thought possible. While my friends spend their days gossiping and stabbing each other in the back I pray to leave so I might help the country and find my place in this world. All I've ever wanted to be is a success and I feel that if I try as hard as I can I will succeed in anything I try.
I stopped exercising for about a week now. I don't know why but I found that my spiritual fitness was more important. I think I'll run tomorrow to make sure my legs still work though :lol: I have continued to lose weight and body fat and I am finding it more easy to love myself now that I am finally having things shape up.
My recruiter called today to let me know that she expects the interview to be this week. I certainly hope so as I feel that I have overstayed my welcome here. Although, things have been going well between my parents and myself, I feel that is only because I gave them my tax refund check which was for almost 1000 dollars. It's the least I can do though. I go to work with my mom some days so she doesn't have to work so hard and I know she won't yell at me as long as I am helpful and quiet. Today I cleaned the whole house again and changed out everyone's bed sheets. I feel the best when I can help others.
The only qualm I have with anything is the fact that my younger sister who is going to be 18 on Friday does nothing around the house. I even clean her room and put her clothes away. I think she has a sense of entitlement because she has a job but when I started working the day of my 16th birthday instead of having a party I'm no inclined to feel sorry for her. I worked every single day during my junior and senior year and maintained a 5.97 GPA where there is a possibility of her failing. I don't like to compare myself to her but it's hard when I'm picking up her slack every day and I have to carefully put away her clothes and she'll yell at me if I don't.
Okay rant over.
I have a song of the day!!
It's the new The Fray song, "You Found Me"